Bearing Oneself

For about 10 days, I searched for a topic to write about. I don’t know why, but I couldn’t finish any: these were the topics I tried to write about but couldn’t complete: The Meaning of Life According to X, The Last Supper, How Life Was Started According to Abrahamic Religions, Hamas, Bin Laden. But none of them worked.

This morning, when I woke up, I received a Socrates quote from one of the most brilliant people on Earth. That quote made me think. Then, I tried to come up with my own and made this: “A man who can’t bear himself, his thoughts, and his solitude will ever achieve greatness.” I sent it back to him and asked his opinion. As usual, he texted: “Idk.” Then, “It is a great topic to write about for a blog.” I texted back: “:)”.

So, here I am, writing about “Bearing oneself.” (Some people call it meditation but I don’t think it is meditation. There are many types, rituals and etc of meditation. I just come up with phrase just to bear oneself and it is beautiful + This is going to be only my opinions, not science-based or scientific proofs).

I do believe that anyone who is unable to sit by him/her, reflecting on his/her thoughts, actions, behaviors, will be in trouble to find his/her own path in life — be it in career, personal life, hobbies or any other part of life. Solitude gives a chance to look inside, assess how one is doing, where one is going and why. By this, he/she can judge him/herself whether he/she is doing great, good or fucking everything up. If one can’t sit by him/herself, he/she eventually follows whatever is ‘cool’ or everyone else is doing rather than discovering him/herself, passions, interests or hobbies. This, indeed, leads to unbearable life which comes with bonuses such as depression, stress or suicide. For instance, one of the greatest mind of all time, my career role model Steve Jobs was big believer of meditation which mainly consisted of just sitting by himself and observing his own mind. Here is quote from him:

- "If you just sit and observe, you will see how restless your mind is. If you try to calm it, it only makes it worse, but over time it does calm, and when it does, there's room to hear more subtle things--that's when your intuition starts to blossom and you start to see things more clearly and be in the present more. Your mind just slows down, and you see a tremendous expanse in the moment. You see so much more than you could see before."

Additionally, Ray Dalio, Kobę Bryant, Oprah Winfrey, Naval Ravikant and many other great minds from past and present endorsed to meditate as a way to sit down with one’s own thoughts.

Many people (myself included) around my age feel dissatisfied by themselves and the possessions that they have. Sitting alone and doing nothing can help us appreciate and be more grateful for ourselves and the things we have. I used to compare myself to students who only went to college and didn’t need a part time job to cover their expenses. At certain phase of my college life, I blamed my parents for not providing better conditions for my studies. With sitting in solitude, I realized how rare my situation was compared to people around my age in my home country. My parents provided more than enough; the problem was my lazy ass (which is still) and my desire that everything should be done for me. Comparing myself to high school peers school made me realize how luck I am to have been born for my parents. Main reason for this realization was, I believe, sitting in solitude.

After sitting quietly for a few minutes, mind starts to wander and connect ‘the dots’. This is going to be one of the most essential experiences for people in our generation as we can differentiate ourselves by our creativity skills from AI tools. I do think that traveling, observing art, and spending time in solitude are three key (mayhaps only) ways to nurture creativity, connect the dots and produce some unique work. As mentioned above earlier, Ray Dalio also practices meditation or ‘bearing his own mind’. Here is a quote from him about the connection between meditation and creativity:

"Great ideas strike you during meditations because you connect to your subconscious, where your creativity flourishes." (Source)

To conclude, I believe that meditation (bearing one’s own mind) helps us to become better at most of the things. However, the most important benefit is opportunity to know ourselves better than anyone. Knowing better oneself helps to evaluate and work on strengths/weaknesses. For those who wish to sit in solitude with their thoughts, it’s important to understand that it won’t be easy. I didn’t achieve full concentration yet even if it is being couple of days. In the beginning, you might get confused as you try to focus and stop your mind/thoughts, it is not going to stop but mess up. The key thing is to just let them go without reacting to/judging them. Just let it wander. It is absolutely life-changing habit, do it.

Seoul, Korea

08/09/2024